The Discretion of an Onion
“Life,” she pontificated, “is like an onion.”
Life is composed of layers upon layers of personal information, all wrapped around an invisible core. The outer layer is our conversation (in every sense of the word) visible to the whole world—our basic physical appearance, external activities, reputation (public history), and general demeanor. The more potent inner layers of our nature are hidden from general view.
We reveal more of our inner character to those we know we can trust. A few inner layers may be revealed to casual friends—our likes and dislikes, some personal history, special interests, natural reactions, general life goals. More layers are unveiled before family and a few close friends—our strengths and weaknesses, deeper personal history, secrets, opinions, prayers and dreams.
Only the Lord sees the full, true heart of the onion along with every layer of our personality and life.
How can I be sincere and without guile if I hide facets of myself from other people?
We live in a tell-all society, where personal secrets are front-page news. After generations of “letting it all hang out” we now live with a warped sense of decency, a mistaken idea of sincerity, very little first-hand experience with discretion, and an inflated value of general knowledge (versus wisdom).
In government we understand the need for having both public records and classified information. Public and classified information (when correct) do not contradict each other. They serve different purposes. Classified information is sensitive; it could cause harm if it fell into the wrong hands.
The sad thing is many people do not “classify” any of their personal information, to keep it out of the hands of careless friends, harmful gossips, or unknown enemies. They don’t see the point of withholding information from people it does not directly concern or edify. They think they are being deceptive or secretive if they hold back anything of who they are and what they know.
What they don’t realize is that the individual layers of an onion (by which I mean the many facets of a life) are all made of the same basic material. Our basic material, as followers of the Lord Jesus Christ, is Truth. There is no guile in showing only a layer or two of truth to some people while showing more, deeper layers of truth to other people. The inner layers may be more potent, but they are not more real or true than the outer layers.
The Lord Jesus Himself was careful about what He revealed of Himself to His own disciples. Peter, James, and John were closer to Him, and saw more of His glory on earth, than the other nine.
By being discreet about the inner workings of our heart, personal and family shortcomings, private problems, other people’s business, even (Connie, dear) personal opinions, we keep our sincerity in check.
For, discretion (classified information) keeps absolute sincerity from becoming thoughtless and coarse. By the same token, sincerity (layers of the same material) keeps discretion from being secretive and deceptive.
“As a jewel of gold in a swine’s snout, so is a fair woman which is without discretion” (Proverbs 11:22).
“When wisdom entereth into thine heart, and knowledge is pleasant unto thy soul; Discretion shall preserve thee, understanding shall keep thee” (Proverbs 2:10–11).